I had a whole post planned about Christmas, which is somewhere in my drafts I suppose?
Anywhere, as New Years go…this was a bit chaotic.
James and I went to my colleague’s house party, where there were meant to be quite a few people, but it ended up being just 8 of us, which was a bit odd (very quiet for a house party!). Her husband was already super drunk, and just got more and more so throughout the night! It was all chaotic, but all in all, a good night. They had 3 of those sky lanterns, but the only one that was successfully launched was the one that I did… The other two, well, 1 got a hole in, the other was set on fire…and nearly burned someone’s hair off! I kicked someone in the face (they were pulling on my heel and I just reacted instinctively!) and made their nose bleed super badly, and James got touched up and had a proper moment with our host’s husband! It was hilarious, and I’m glad we went.
There ends the amusement.
We got home at 1:30 (pretty light for a night out!) and went straight to bed. I’d noticed that one of our friends, Morgan, had removed himself from our Cartagena Reunion Facebook group, but I assumed it was an accident, and didn’t think anything of it. Then, I woke up this morning and on my timeline is a post from Morgan saying…well…saying he’s had enough really. That his life has been so awful over the past year (it genuinely has) and that he can’t cope anymore. This was at about midnight, and then he disappeared off the face of the earth. Everyone is trying to find him, loads of posts about it, and long story short, he was eventually found at about 13:15 today. He was fine, not in a good mental state, but good enough that he was checked over at the hospital and now two of his friends have brought him home. We’re all going to back off so he’s not inundated (I bet his phone will be blowing up when he eventually turns it on), but it’s really made me think about life.
I know it’s a total cliché, but stuff like that really does make you think. We’re all meant to be going to Manchester this weekend to go out for the night and then do go-karting on the Sunday. It’s a meet-up for Garage 5 from the Cartagena track day. We all became so close over those 3 days, and I’ll be forever grateful we met.
Life has a funny way of kicking you up the butt. I never used to do anything; I never went out, I would sit at home on my laptop, or my phone, or reading, and I would never do anything sociable. I’d occasionally meet a close friend, or go out with family, but not often. Since meeting James, all of that has changed. I have a wider friendship group, I’ve made friends with these people on my own! I’m in a job I enjoy, and I chose to go out with them instead of sitting around doing nothing. I go with James to trackdays and make friends with the people there.
All this with Morgan this morning? It’s made me realise how important it is for me to live my life, to see my friends, and to tell people how much they mean to me. I don’t want to be sat there again thinking “But I was just going to say how much I was looking forward to seeing them”. It’s all well and good all these people turning round and saying how much Morgan means to them now, but it would have been even better if we had all been paying better attention to the signs he gave that things weren’t right, and then offered help or support.
Go out, tell your friends they matter to you. Sure, you might get a few funny looks, or someone saying you’re being soppy, but for one of the people you talk to, that may have just been the difference between them giving up, or reaching out.